Horror Film Friday Returns with The Gorge | Military Sci-fi Horror Film


An evergreen reminder because although every year I grow older, I will never change. If you're new here, please know that my film reviews are crap and never to be taken seriously because I do not take notes and my memory is an unreliable thing but if you're okay with that, well, here's another!

It's been a while since I posted a horror movie review. Lately I tend to watch them, log them on Letterbxd (friend me if you feel like it) and then mostly forget all about them. Anyhow, here's one I watched a little bit ago. Have you seen it?


The Gorge, 2025


Synopsis

Two highly-trained operatives are appointed to posts in guard towers on opposite sides of a vast and highly classified gorge, protecting the world from an undisclosed, mysterious evil that lurks within. They bond from a distance while trying to stay vigilant in defending against an unseen enemy. When the cataclysmic threat to humanity is revealed to them, they must work together in a test of both their physical and mental strength to keep the secret in the gorge before it's too late.—Apple TV+


My Two Cents for Free!

This one starts out gorgeously. It pulled me in after it hinted at a promising fiery pit of hell and the flirty-from-afar romance that blossoms despite the chasm of hellfire that lies between them. What's romance without a few lurking threats to life and limb?

Amazing premise. I was all in. The gorgeous, damaged characters, the cutesy banter, the humor & longing looks through the binoculars, and the escalating danger hooked me in but then, oh but then, it took a turn. Some people may enjoy this turn but folks I did not and it started to put me to sleep the same way most action films tend to do. I was hoping for intelligent, nasty monsters and brutal hellfire and imaginative secrets but instead the military machinations and nefarious gobbledy gook ramped up (ugh, my brain didn't want to process any of that) and it seemed to turn into one big, dull chase scene with a lot of shooty-shooty happening. Who can outrun who without getting murdered first? Who cares. What a waste of creatures and interesting characters, if you ask me. All of the charm was snatched from my grasp and the rest was a snoozefest.

But it's probably a me problem.

I'm disappointed because it was headed for a five star, but that lackluster military plotline and those lifeless (and endless!) chase scenes brought everything down. Bummer.  The monsters looked cool but I'm pretty sure I've seen an earlier iteration of them in an old Clive Barker film called Nightbreed and also maybe a little bit of them in The Last of Us which would've been fine if they had done something other than run around like rabid things chasing our lovebirds. 

Nightbreed gif


Alas, I guess this is what happens when one grows up watching nothing but horror films and The Smurfs.  Expectations are HIGH, damn it!

⭐⭐⭐

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